chicks before dicks.
**Note: I wrote this awhile ago but figured it went well with the last blog.
This one is going to be a bit of a rant. About women.Well, eventually about women.
SO. A very good friend of mine left me a couple e-mails that I got this afternoon. I called her immediately. Why the fuck are some women such fucking… why is it that some of us cannot live by simple fucking basic rules? It comes down to the fact that I love my close girlfriends. I adore them. Even the ones I don’t talk to very often. They are amazing and fabulous and it makes me unbelievably angry when someone hurts them.
Basically, this certain friend has a horrible ex. Well, maybe he is not horrible but he was horrible to her. I hate him. Well, maybe I don’t hate him. I never got to know him well enough to really hate him. I just dislike him immensely. There are several reasons for this, one of them being the fact that he is an unbelievable tool, but what he did to my dear friend is definitely the reason for the intensity of my dislike.
The issue is that my friend just found out that one of her very good friends has been dating this ex. Behind her back. She just told her last night. She has been to his house for dinner “a couple times”, and he has been to “a few” dinners at hers. Am I alone in thinking this may be a mild understatement? Anyways, supposedly she broke it off with this guy after she talked to my friend because “it wasn’t worth losing that friendship.”
Too little, too late, honey.
I’m sorry but I have a very short fuse for this kind of shit. A few things about me: I can hold a grudge like you wouldn’t believe. I can also be incredibly forgiving, if you are honest and sincere in the end about wanting to be forgiven, starting with some magic words (hint: the magic words are “I’m sorry”). I can also put up with a lot of bullshit and be understanding in the end, because I believe we all make mistakes and make asses out of ourselves.
However. This kind of forgiving nature ends when it comes to my friends. The holding-a-grudge part does not. I have absolutely no problem hating – I mean disliking you immensely – if you have done something to a friend of mine, especially my close girlfriends, even if I hardly know you. ESPECIALLY if I hardly know you because I have no reason to think anything else about you. I don’t give a shit if she forgives you. She should. She should be a bigger person and rise above whatever you have done. I don’t have to. I can keep disliking you, no fucking problem.
And this is one of those things that results in me disliking someone immensely. I know this bitch – although not very well. But basically? She should fucking know better. She and my friend are close. She knows ALLLLL about my friend’s ex and what he did to her. And yet… I don’t know, fucking him and then cooking him dinner was not apparently out of the question. But NOW she wants to try and save the friendship??
Think again bitch.
Maybe the first time he e-mailed you? Remember that? THAT was when you said to my friend, “hey your ex wants to hook up with me, is that cool?” THAT is how you show a friendship matters to you and how you avoid risking it. Even though you know she won’t be ok with that because this ex broke her heart. No, he didn’t just break her heart. He fucking stomped on it and did the happy dance with some chick. Which is why you never told her. Until now. Which is (in my opinion by definition) too fucking late.
Plus, I have very good reason to believe the reason she finally told my friend is because she was about to get her ass busted.
So shut your fucking face about the friendship being SO important to you.
Basically, I don’t understand women sometimes. Why the fuck do we do shit like this to each other?? Do we really need men that fucking bad that we forget who is at our side through thick and thin?? Who will be there when that guy breaks our heart, when he doesn’t call back, when he can’t fucking pull his shit together?? Do we need that companionship so much that we forget who will love us and be there no matter what? How is it that we can’t fucking remember that our friendships are what sustain us, when relationships can come and go. I would never, could never do what this girl has done. I don’t care how hot he is (he is not hot, fyi) or what kind of a connection I have with him. My girls are my girls, first and foremost.
And relationships… you just never know what is going to happen with them. I mean, I get that eventually your relationship with your significant other should be number one, but it also should not make you hurt those that are closest to you. I just don’t fucking get it. And to me, the inability to understand how important your girlfriends are, and to treat them accordingly, says something so fundamental about your moral character that I prefer to never give you a shot at making me think twice about disliking you. I don’t need another friend. The ones I have are fantastic enough.
Its just all fucking bullshit and the women who act like this… fucking think twice. 99 times out of a 100, it won’t be worth it. Trust me.
I think we actually said it best in high school… and more concisely:
Chicks before dicks. Bitch.